By Leesa Harker
Leesa Harker's extraordinary Liverpool-based parody of fifty colors tells of the adventures of White Lightning-swigging Maggie Muff, who meets Mr great on the Dole Tall, darkish and shaggable he might be, yet his pursuits are faraway from traditional, and while he introduces Maggie to the purple Room of ache she realises that she could have bitten off greater than she will chew.If you are looking for books like 50 colours of gray, yet wish anything funnier, filthier and set within the center of Liverpool, this can be the fitting publication for you. the foundation for the sell-out play, starring Dannielle Malone.
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Extra resources for 51 Shades of Maggie, Liverpool Style. A Liverpool parody of Fifty Shades of Grey
Then later on, I was lyin on my bed thinkin about her bitch-slappin him – an I was mad with jealousy! And I thought, I think I might love the bastard!! Then I thought about him in those chinos an I was ringin again. A Shag on the Bus Tour The next day Mr Big texted me sayin to come over an see him cos he wanted to talk to me. And I thought to myself, ‘What am I doin with this man? ’ But then I thought about his arse in those chinos ... So, I put on my illuminous yellow miniskirt an my illuminous orange vest top with a blue suede belt to draw his eye down to the Muff area.
Nine-to-five Hell The next day, I woke up top-an-tailed with Big Sally-Ann. An that’s worse than it sounds, cos her feet are the size of breeze blocks, an they smell of cheese an sweat. An she is the length of the bed, so her feet were restin on my pillow right beside my head. It was like bein brought round with smellin salts. So I got up to make us a bacon sandwich when I heard my phone beepin. It was Mr Big sendin me a text message: ‘Margaret, you are going to get a phone call from the Job Centre.
Result! Then I got into my flat an I was so depressed about Mr Big not wantin to spend the night with me, I rang Big Sally-Ann to tell her. I told her about Mr Big’s mum an dad’s house an the jacuzzi an she said it all sounded too good to be true. Then I told her about Mr Big not wantin me to touch him an that he wouldn’t stay with me an that I was lonely, an she said that’s not on. ‘I’ll be there in ten with White Lightning and Columbo. An I thought to myself, my man may be a cold-hearted twat, but my bezzy mate’s the fuckin dog’s bollocks.
51 Shades of Maggie, Liverpool Style. A Liverpool parody of Fifty Shades of Grey by Leesa Harker